Running Lucky
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Title: Running Lucky
Author: Kelly J. Thompson
Rating: PG
Category: I'm not really sure, probably Doggett Bashing and
Humor I hope.
Summary: Doggett's luck is running out on him.
Spoilers: The Gift and probably the eighth season in general.
Disclaimer: Doggett Belongs to Chris Carter, 1013 and Fox
Television. Mulder belongs to me... what? Oh, I guess not my
head says he belongs to Carter and Co. but, My heart says
he belongs to David Duchovny. So, I guess that Mulder
belongs to both of them.
Archive: Anywhere, just tell me first but, please keep the
notes and personal rantings attached if, you don't like them
don't archive the story.
Feedback: The good, the bad, or the ugly I don't care. Just
send me Feedback. foreverkel@zoominternet.net
Author's Notes: I'm reposting this because the doggie loving
fics have to many recently
*********************************
Running Lucky
By: Kelly J. Thompson
foreverkel@zoominternet.net
Hello, I'm John Doggett's luck, but please call me Lucky. I'm going
to be quitting, so I decided that a nickname was in order. Why,
do I want to quit you ask. There is no room for me here anymore
Ego and Stupidity have taken over, and it's making my job a living
hell. Yes, you heard me correctly, and yes I left out his Machismo
because you see he doesn't have a whole lot of that. I know he acts
like he does but, he has aspirations of being just like J. Edgar
Hoover if you know what I mean and, then there's this guy named
Larry in VCS that sends his lust through the roof. But, I digress.
Back to the reasons I'm quitting. I think I'll start with Ego. My
god is it ever huge. The man thinks he's the best thing since sliced
bread. He thinks he knows everything, and that everyone should
go by what he says because he is always right. Give me a break
on that one I mean his stupidity out grew his intellect a long time
ago, but ego is blind to it. His intellect only goes far enough to
slightly cover up his stupidity. So, his ego overrides common
sense and believes every word Stupidity says, thus making it
necessary for me to jump in constantly. Man, I really hate
this job.
Now, moving on to Stupidity. Ahh, this is where most of my
problems lie. His stupidity actually thinks it's intellect, but
stupidity is it's name so, I can understand why it thinks that.
But, I'm constantly stepping in to cover up his mistakes I work
around the clock to insure that his stupidity isn't discovered. It
actually was found out once when Mr. Doggett was in high
school, and the man never lived it down. Because, I'm
embarrassed at just how bad I slipped that day all I'll say that
happened was that it involved a prank he tried to play and he
kind of left an identifying item behind. To this day his former
classmates still call him Dumb, Dumb, Doggie. Have I
mentioned yet that I hate this job?
Take this last week for example Stupidity told Doggett a bunch
of assumptions and Ego took those assumptions and ran with
them and the man went and got himself killed. Do you know how
hard I had to work to get the soul eater thing to take his death?
Sure, it looked easy but believe me I had to talk to the soul
eater's intellect and his pain to convinced them that it was better
for the soul eater die then than live in agony any more and, finally
they agreed. So, that was my last straw with this job. Ego and
Stupidity are on their own, and I can't wait until all hell breaks
loose. Maybe Intellect will finally take over but, with Ego and
Stupidity as large as John Doggett's I very much doubt it.
I've been thinking about where to go now, I want to find someone
with loads of intellect and a small ego. Someone like Fox Mulder
sure his luck works hard too, but the intellect on that man would
blow John Doggett's out of the water a million times over. And,
Mulder's ego isn't big enough in my opinion he has done so many
noble things in his life, but his guilt doesn't let him believe that.
I think I'm going to ask Mulder's luck if it could use an assistant.
because, we all know that with John Doggett investigating his
disappearance his luck will definitely need some help. Well, I'm
off to get me a new job. Thanks for listening.
Signed,
Lucky
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Additional Notes: I know this was stupid but, damn was it ever
fun it write. You know something, I'm kind of starting to like this
Doggett character because he's just so fun to pick on otherwise I
would rather live without him. Again, Nothing personal to Robert
Patrick.